A Forgone Tale

He was the Ocean,
She was his moon.
They met at the horizon,
Till eternity Endured.

Rolling along waiting for her,
Smashing along mountains to dust.
Washing ashore to the cold night,
Whilst basking in her light, so bright.
Longing for her, chasing her sight.
Moving towards horizon in eternal twilight.

Only to discover that he hadn’t moved,
That hope was as fickle as her mood.

Deceived by the horizon near,
The promise of being close to dear,
So dashed, he lived in fear,
And in hopes, that she’d shed a tear.

Whispering, remember you I always shall,
Those eyes, forever my dream shall enthrall.
As begins my long nights rest,
Among darkness and fear, I try and zest.
For they are now, where I nest.
And through the veil, I shall always wish you the best.

Parchment Tales - Part III

 This page is dedicated to all the short little stories that can be expressed in a few lines or at most a paragraph. For all such thoughts ma we live long and prosper. This is Part -III of the tales. Part four is being published when more of these tales are written. Please do share if you like something but with credits.

What is love? 

If love was just an emotion

Then the Taj Mahal should’ve vanished in an instant

If love was just an expression

Romeo and Juliet’s story shouldn’t be considered a tragedy

If love was just an impression

Then Calcutta should be only city with a Theresa statue

If love was just a reaction

Then there shouldn’t be so many soldiers who head home in coffins

If love was just a feeling

Then why does a year in it and a second without it feel the same

 Evolution of the Wish

As humans, as we grow older we want different things, we wish for diverse entities. As children we wished for chocolates and we dreamed that we would become astronauts or pilots when we grew up. We wished for the sky and its stars.
A little older and we wished for whatever the coolest things available were.
Growing up somewhere along the way we accepted that our childhood dreams were in fact childish and maybe unrealistic in execution.
It is then that we obtained new dreams, new hopes and new friends.
In all our journeys we forever search for the constant that defines us and once we find it we hope we stay content.
Truly heartbreaking however is if we lose that constant, be it by choice or prejudice. How we handle such a loss and how we deal with it defines us, changes us. Recovering from it might not ever be possible and we truly never heal but the certain fact is that, that incident changes our reality. How we adjust to our new reality, to reach our dreams is what defines and makes us.

And through this entire path if someone ever points out to all your flaws, then tell them this

“Love, no diamond ever formed through millions of years of heat and pressure, ever came our flawless. The only flawless ones are the ones that are truly artificial” 

Tribute to a Freedom Fighter:

The man standing with a noose around his neck has a serene smile playing on his lips.

The reporter from across the yard dares shout "  Was it all worth it? is it worth dying at 23?"

He beams and replies " To die for what i love? and that too at my age? I lived for my country, fought for her freedom and now will die for it. Absolutely and if i could i would beg god to give me a thousand lives to live a thousand times over so that i may live a life in service to my mother and if needed die for her in her arms.

The lever was pulled and a life was taken but his words on the headline the next day  created anew a revolution and inspired a thousand new patriots

**The above is in tribute Ram Prasad Bismil, an Indian freedom fighter who when asked if it was worth dying for the motherland replies that " he like to live a thousand lives a thousand times over just so that he could die in service to his motherland***

Parchment Tales - Part II

This page is dedicated to all the short little stories that can be expressed in a few lines or at most a paragraph. For all such thoughts ma we live long and prosper. This is Part -II of the tales. Part three is being published shortly. Please do share if you like something but with credits.

A Lighthouse's Sorrow 

Every ship heading to shore looks out,

For that one beam of light to guide it home.

For without it he is naught but a wreck

But remember it takes courage and will.

To be willing to stand along in the perilous sea.

To be the light to guide everyone home

While being alone so that others may rest and watch their kids grow

 Broken Vows 

Good bye were the words used to break the vow we had taken

But love,

A few of us mean each of the promises me speak,

Fighting every obstruction because we intend to keep

Against the flow no matter how big the leak

But I now think I was mistaken

In the simulators that I thought we had awoken

Guess it was time to get my heart torn asunder

For being naïve and making this blunder

 A Warrior's love 

Men ran and hearts broke whenever he swung his sword

But inside his house with his love

Only longing eyes and loving hands interacted

As they shared the burden of keeping their love together

Using those skilled hand to help her prepare their supper

Working the kitchen they just complimented each other

Eternity itself commented that it couldn’t find anyone better for each other

 Broken Hearted Secret

What is the secret behind such good stories asked the reporter

“Love” he answered.

So who is the lucky lady? Was the followup

“Was, not is “ was his barely audible reply

A Wandering Seeker

We are all wanderers, searching for the one thing,
A place where our thoughts lie broken,
But in you every magic awoken.

To some,

We look for it in people, others look for it in the far flung corners of this globe.

For at that place every random thought is bliss,
And with that person every foolish act missed.

Only the luckiest of us ever find this place easy.

For each our we have our battles to win to end up in the place because here it is
“Victory or Coward’s hell”

The world now is full of people seeking, maybe its time for a few seekers to even seek to help others in reaching their goals.

Maybe through such seekers happiness just might have a better chance in the world.

Broken Hearted Bravery 

Only the bravest of us still show our backs to the one’s who’ve betrayed us.

We understand the staying ahead with our backs to them is a proposition much better than going back to cross swords with someone behind us.

Leading is always a better choice , but the wounds of past ghouls always shall haunt our souls helping us grow and keep moving further step by step

True Defeat 

Do you know when you’ve truly lost?

When all your words stop having an affect.

When you feel like the world no longer wants to hear your story.

What you fill the pages with all you can write
                                  but

Those letters and word’s never reach your world

Then you have truly lost because even you pen no longer has a reason to exist.

What the heart wants 

You could be someone who drives the whole world insane but all we want for this life and in the next is
“The one person who can drive us insane while maintaining their own sanity” for that is what is truly precious to us in the whole wide world

Parchment Tales - Part I

This page is dedicated to all the short little stories that can be expressed in a few lines or at most a paragraph. For all such thoughts ma we live long and prosper. This is Part -I of the tales. Part two is being published shortly. Please do share if you like something but with credits.

 Travelers Lament

They say travel makes us grow and learn new things . As much as that is true , it also makes us yearn for the things that were . When you see a thousand year old fort standing strong even after the infinite ravages of time and after facing the savages of the invading hoarded, you wonder. You wonder why is it that objects we build last a thousand years but the love we build doesn’t even survive a lifetime. Just as Optimus sends his message among the stars, this message I send to one I loved and lost. All us joy yet lost. I would still love to build a lifetime with you. Forgive this selfish but repentant man and give him another chance. Lest he lose his mind and heart to a love he could never have

A Little Girls Question

A little girl once asked her father, a pilot who was fond of trekking .

Why? Why do u do it? You run out of breath quite a lot you get hurt whenever you slip and left with quite a bit of pain for a few days after. Why even do it. The view from your’ cockpit must be much much better.

The pilot smiles and replies, but my love you forgot the most important thing of all.

What?

That I conquered a mountain with patience and persistence. And you and I  can both be proud that even a mountain could stop your father

A Revolutionaries Response

The man standing with a noose around his neck had a serene smile playing on his lips.

The reporter across the yard shouts “Was it all worth it? Is it worth dying at 23?

He beams and says “To die for what I love? And that too at my age? I lived for my country , her freedom and am dying for her. Absolutely and if I could I would beg god to give me a thousand loves to live the same life a thousand times over so that I may live in service if my mother and if needed die for her in her arms.”

The lever was pulled and a life was taken but the words on paper the next day created a hundred new revolutionaries and inspired a thousand new patriots.

  Ghost Ship

A ghost ship they call it naught a reason.

Those meant to guide and care are present not.

Destined to drift to every whim of the ocean turbulent

Never to rest but toss about, from wave to wave rolling under the mast

To crash upon an unknown shore or drown in a watery shoal

Only death awaits the ghostly ship, just like a heart abandoned by, for those it lives

  Icarus and Ulleyses

 My love

Chasing the sun across the emerald sea

Is a dream for us and for many

But make remember that

Icarus burnt his wings getting too close and

Ulysses had to endure mortal agony just to live through one small sea

 Octogenarian Wisdom 

I love her with all my heart, but I now don’t know what to do said the twenty and three year old

But my son isn’t that all you need asked the octogenarian grandfather

Looking at his grandson’s face he continued

 A Promise of Nothings 

Let’s go hunting my love he said holding her close

But what for ? We have everything we need she asked

For everything and nothing

For the nothings that I can promise you and the everything I can give you he replied pulling her close

A Man's Shrine

What a sight would the lone beam of a light house be,
To a man long sailing along in the deep blue sea,
For years trying to reach the horizon,
Only to find himself from whence he set forth from.

What a sight would be a clear blue stream,
To a nomad wandering in the desert’s harsh gleam,
Travelling among the endless sand,
All the while,
Wishing for the oasis’s calm.

What a sight would be, a rose’s bloom
To a soldier, fighting amongst the jaded gloom
With foe’s far and near, to protect his near and dear,
Wishing he can at least go home in a light year.

What sight would it be, his love’s smile
To a man deprived of love all his while,
would not she be his angel divine,
and somewhere he could finally call his shrine.

The Dark Road

A twinkle in the dark,
What does it mark
Against darkness so stark
Not a sound you can hark.

Darkness from a mother’s womb,
Or found in the depths of an Ocean’s tomb,
Searching for that bright little plume
Am I moving towards health or to my doom.

Scares me not the nights’ terror,
Only yhe pain of hearts error,
Looking around and hoping for a mirror,
Realising, In error would be the bearer

So who shall walk this dark road
To collect all of life’s debts owed
Hoping they don’t fall off a node,
Following the blind kings’ code.

Mind Games

The way my life goes,
I feel the need for ego’s.
For every man believes he’s best,
When all he is, is nothing but a jest.
Forever I strive like a knight,
Night and day against all odds I fight,
Even when there’s a lingering doubt,
About all the battles that I’ve ever fought,
For various causes with unimaginable result.
All I saw were assholes trying to assert,
What they thought was might,
Only to fall down mid-flight.
A rudderless ship I still remain,
Eternally, In neck deep electric pain,
Like a wingless plane,
But making sure all people see is the smooth plain,
Of an exterior running calm,
Hiding a turmoil, like a barn in a farm.
To try and find my bearings I search,
Frowning at the way’s fools like a grouch,
Only to find my way I trample,
Trying, on my way every sample,
Knowing that they are all the same,
Similar stuff with just a different name.
I wonder though “What will happen
If I let the winds in my sail slacken?”
So I run around, fearing a broken mast,
And my wings shearing off from flying too fast,
In already a rudderless state,
Awaiting my next wrong mate,
Wondering what the hell is that I need,
To stay happy without a glass of mead.

An Empty Court

An empty court, A royal seat.
A Kingly crown, A queen feast
A banquet for the victory won
A vigil for the departed son.

A kingdom won, Subjects lost,
A war fought, deadly its cost.
A clink of gold, the clang of swords.
A headstone and a table with different words.

History in all its wisdom,
Created a deadly system.
Kill or be killed was the natural law
For the planet after the thaw.

To what end, would this war lead
Leaving widows and heartache in its stead.
For what do we stand up and fight,
every moment from whence we see light.

The love we have remembers us,
The one’s whose eyes we close, hasn’t a fuss,
Every victory, every crown, every ego ever won,
Empty handed into the ground was how the emperor had gone.
Left behind were the people he loved,
Who remembered and wept for their beloved.

Love Lost and Lessons Larned - I

When there’s only one of us all you think of is dying, but when there are two of us all you think about is surviving atleast for the sake of each other

You get to know more about love not when you are falling in it but when you are falling out of it.

The days are all the same, each resembling the other. The routine was getting a bit tedious. The office looked the same a hundred different cubicles divided into the large expanse. They resembled each other down to the last detail. This was his new acquisition, the new area he had acquired to shift his company to after expanding it. He was already starting to feel the strings of a headache beginning, the precursor to bad night’s sleep and an even crazier morning. The strange feeling that was engulfing him looking at this new office was new to him. He was aware from where the feeling stemmed and why they existed but he wasn’t sure what he could do to stop them.

He was nostalgic, guilty and happy. This was a bittersweet memory. He was happy that he had achieved what not many people had achieved. He had his own company and not a small one either. It was now a company that employed around a thousand people. All the hard work since when he had passed out of that graduation college six years ago was finally paying off. He was happy that he had all that but he was sad that he didn’t have the right people to share it with. He had lost his parents two years after he had graduated. They were coming back from a small family drive. The ass who had hit our car had been drunk early in the evening. He didn’t even stop to tend and check if we were alive. He was least concerned about what happened. The only reason he lived was because he was thrown out of the car at the initial impact. The others were crushed like matchsticks when the car did three barrel rolls after impact. All of his family, including his parents and his sweet little sister. The ass who hit the car had paid for what he did with his life in prison. Their memories were what made him this melancholy. But he was also happy that his mother would’ve been proud that her son had grown this much, his sister would’ve been happy that she could shop like crazy with the elder brother’s money and well as for his father. He would’ve been glad to prove the old man wrong when he always said ” You are good for nothing kid,  You’ll never make anything good”. For all of their happiness and his shared feelings he would’ve been happy and for his loss of that he was now sad.

The sharp ring of his phone brought him back to reality. The image of his love flashed across his screen. Well a bit of cheer on this murky day he thought. “yes love, what can I do for you?” The smile in  her voice upon listening to him was evident in her reply of ‘just come back fast. I have something to share with you.’ “is it important?’ ‘what do ya think?’ came the taunting reply. “be there in half an hour I replied and started from my office. I had a company for cyber security and forensics that was running in full swing and the demand for my work was also becoming something every CEO would be proud of and envious of. He had another thing to be proud of: he and his lady love were 8months into the making of their own baby. He was gonna be a father and his love was gonna be a mother. The picture was perfect for the future as far as one could see. The thing about love is that “Love is not about possession, it’s about appreciation”. I was well into appreciating all the things I was lucky to have and also all the things that I had lost. The drive back home was remarkably short inspite of the 8 km drive with a stop in between to pick up her favorite pistachio milkshake(which started after she got pregnant, making me wonder about what the child will turn out to be, but meh no worries, he/she is after all going to be our child, he/she will just be awesome). The greeting of ‘love im back’ was cut short as she rushed into my arms, held me tight and then gave me a tender kiss for a second. ‘What’s with the abundance love?’ I queried. ‘I can’t kiss my husband now?’ came her cross eyed but  beautiful looking reply. The sarcasm and the barbs were how we showed our love to each other. I guess those were the disadvantages of marrying a girl who was your equal in intelligence and more than a match for you in using it. The point that we both agreed on was rare but what we compromised on was more than enough and the one point on which we never argued was ”The world doesn’t lack intelligence but rather the ability, skill or courage to use it”. I know everyone wonders what my wife does or is doing, well not to break the bubble she does everything, and I mean everything. She is just the kind of person who can do any job, work anywhere and shell have people worshipping/following her like a pack of puppies. I might be exaggerating but what the hell, I will because I am proud of my wife and what she can do. The dinner that night and my nagging her to take her meds went the normal way. I didn’t even have an inking of the terrors that night would hold for me.

01:25am

I felt something warm, wet and stick underneath me. The bed it was wet, but how? I turned on the light to see her, my love lying beside me in a pool of blood, blood which the bed was dutifully soaking up. The circle of blood was extending radially outward from her belly. I tried waking her up, repeatedly to no avail. I took her pulse, she still has some life left, I had to get her to a hospital and there was no time to wait for an ambulance to arrive. I dashed out of the house carrying her in my arms, still dressed in the casual shorts and taking nothing but my wallet and my car keys from the house. So much as my terror at the sight that I didn’t even lock my house not caring if someone would break into my house. I ran to the car frantically carrying her in my arms as she came to. I deposited her in the front seat and was just getting into the driver’s seat when a dear friend of mine, Joseph laid a hand on my shoulder. I had no idea where he had come from, I had no idea when he had but I was just glad he had. “Why don’t you take the back seat Ro, while I drive” he said “I don’t think you’re in any shape to drive’. Seeing the hesitation on my face he just shouted saying “man you’re in no condition to drive” and in a gentler tone he added “I’ll drive as smoothly and as quickly as possible”. I reluctantly got into the backseat and looked over at her,  she was looking at me and obviously was in pain. I was at a loss, never had I been in such a state since I had grown 6feet tall and sprouted a beard. I told her “Breathe love breath, take a deep breath and hold it, don’t take shallow breaths love, no shallow breaths”. She held my hand below tightly while I was trying to get her to breathe. I didn’t pay attention to what Joseph was doing but apparently he was making a call. By the time I had realized we had arrived at the hospital.

A stretcher was out waiting along with two nurses and a doctor, apparently joseph had called ahead and had them waiting, I silently cursed myself for not thinking of that sooner. I ran alongside the stretcher still holding her hand till we reached some sort of room where the doctor was adamant that I leave her hand and go away till they were able to determine what the problem was. I was scared, I had lost everyone I had, she was my one anchor and she was in danger and I didn’t know what was causing it or how to protect her. I noticed Joseph walking through the lobby towards me and I realized the state I had left the house in. I sent him back to lock the house and take stock of everything there, I was sure his wife Sravani would help out too. I also had another reason to send him back, I worked well alone, I was basically skilled at getting things done on my own. Not that I wasn’t I team player but I like small groups or single work than to large groups. The large groups tended to take democracy a bit too far and always took too long to decide plan and execute something and this was a personal situation, I didn’t want anyone else to be there. Call it my ego r whatever but my faults are mine. I care for her far too much and I am possessive of her so much that I hate to let anyone see her like this so weak looking as if………………………………….as if………………………………………she might die.

2 days later

I was just unable to stand in one place, too much of nerves and too much of caffeine were in my system to allow me some peace and calm. I had called her parents on that morning when the doctors wheeled her into the ICU telling me that they couldn’t tell me anything for 24 hours and that they would keep her under observation until then. They insisted that I go home attend work and all that while they took care and stood by their dear daughter. I was beyond words, they never liked me much, especially not since their daughter married me against their wishes but I was glad that they still loved her just as much as I did. I knew she would get good care and as much as necessary and that I could come back later. As I was walking out I was surprised to see Jo in the lobby waiting for me. I asked him “office?”. He simply shook his head and brought my car around. He drove straight to his house (which is right beside mine). Sravani was there waiting anxiously for the both of us, she first looked at Joseph and then at me and told Jo “go clean up jaan, ill try and feed this one in the meantime”.

The situation in the dining room was comical when Joseph came back after freshening up. I was being stubborn as a child refusing to eat while Sravani was hovering over me a thunderous look on her face trying to feed me like a mother hen. I looked at Jo for help and he held up in hands indicating that it was better to shut up and eat as his wife was not one to give up. Even as he sat down he said “dude, u haven’t eaten in almost 24 hours, u had dinner yesterday, and I know you’ve had nothing in the hospital today because I’ve been watching you. Its 7 in the evening today and u need to eat”. I was already in a sour mood and I retorted “didn’t know u replaced your balls with a pussy Joseph” .  This time the mother hen smacked me on the head and said “Ro, if you don’t eat then we’ll have to throw you into the ICU beside you’re love and then for you she’ll have to get up and work. Is that how you want your wife to spend the days just before delivering your baby, worrying her head off about you? Now just sit up and eat”. I didn’t know Sravani could be so in your face but I guess I took her merits of the argument and ate up. I wanted to go back to my house, Jo escorted me back. Notwithstanding the still  bloodstained sheets in the bedroom I parked myself on the couch in front of the TV and started watching all non-sensical stuff. I called her father once in the middle of the night to ask him if he wanted me to come over and to check on her. Of course the first option wasn’t feasible since all of my vehicle keys were taken over by Jo and all the doors to my house were locked by Sravani so as to force me to take rest.

I wanted to know what they had mixed in that dinner. I was out for a solid of twelve hours and I woke up to find that the sun had risen well past the horizon and that my phone was ringing off the hook. The person calling was my father in law. He informed me that they all were coming home and they would be there in half an hour.

That was a long half an hour indeed.

The ambulance pulled up and instead of my wife getting up from it smiling at me two orderlies got out carrying a stretcher between them. A stretcher on which someone was lying whose face was covered by a white cloth. The stretcher was accompanied by my father in law and mother in law. I started hyperventilating, my heart was beating too fast, my mind refused to  process what was being shown in front. I suddenly felt something give away under my feet; I didn’t realize I had come out of the house. I was utterly flummoxed by the scene unfolding in front of my eyes. I refused to believe what logic told me was true.  Every neuron in my head told me it was true, yet ever cardiac muscle refused to believe it for if it was true then they all would be dead. There was no way that his heart would continue beating without hers to accompany him.  There was no way his lungs would still be breathing without the air touching her. There was no way his eye would still be capable of watching the world once their light had been taken out. There was no way he could still be standing, there was just no energy left in his body.

There was only darkness. The cold understanding darkness. The nothing there was just like what my heart was right now. It was just that good. It was time he began ruining what he had planned the last two weeks. He had sold all of his company in the last two weeks to a friend for the investment he needed. He had spent every waking hour investigating what had happened to her. He knew that she could’ve been save but she hadn’t been. He had wringed every last details from wherever he could. Now was the time for action…………….

Missteps and Misinterpretations

When coming to information and knowledge, our parents are our first teachers, then comes the closest of your family that is the people you spend your childhood with. Growing up we further come into contact with friends and then the formal education system which includes teachers and other subjects which are to form a basis of our education for the future. But before we even get to school, we are already taught and have ingrained in us some of the most important concepts in life. The most important among them being the difference between good an evil, perceived right and wrong, the socially acceptable do's and don'ts, the codes of ethics and moral and also importantly love. There are a lot more of the nuances and fine print details that our parents do their best to teach us and our grandparents try to imbibe in us or our extended family tries to impression on us at that tender age. Our very patient grand parents explain, Our parents love and our aunts and uncles try to bribe us with sweets, chocolates, biscuits but overall they try to teach us something, something that in its core is faulty. We are taught all this but the one fact our people forget to teach us is to think for ourselves We are told to listen to advice and to listen to our parents and elders always apparently because "they know better". What we are taught are pre-fabricated notions and conclusions on what is right and what is wrong

Lets take an example:

A certain set of people in India practicing Hinduism as an active religion are told not to eat meats or any kind of Non-Vegetarian. When a kid gets curious and asks why, he is told that because that certain sect has practiced it since long and since they do pooja you shouldn't partake in meat or alcohol. That in itself stifles that kid's thinking ability, giving him a pre conceived notion and enforcing onto him without a logical or even a remotely valid one with no links to fact is why that kids thinking might be a bit curtailed. The logical reason that this particular community in question are not usually involved in much physical activity, their main profession once upon a time being  spirituality and bureaucracy hence their need for a high amount of protein intake would be low. The elders of old knew this and to keep everyone healthy they gave out wisdom saying that for their own health the members of this community shouldn't partake in much of protein containing meat. The health and the historical precedence, the logical and factual basses are not covered and in India most of our knowledge is being covered as superstition. This needs to change.


A lot of other similar analogies could be applied to our interpretation of good and evil. According to our texts and the knowledge that was passed on to us since old times, A good son is one who cares for his parents, cares for their need and does as much as he can to keep them comfortable and happy. An exceptional son never abandons his parent even in their old age. We tell the tale of Srvana Kumara just to prove this point. To make my point I shall now take the example  of one out greatest villans in mythology, the Demon King Ravana,, whose example is taken as the epitome of evil and someone whom kids should never emulate.



Taking the King Ravana, he ruled over an immensely rich kingdom of Lanka. In all aspects he led a rich comfortable, not lacking for anything life. However on his mothers whim, just to fulfill her wish he left his home for over a year and performed great penance for Lord Shiva. He obtained on his mothers wishes one of the most powerful and exceptionally impossible to obtain articles in all of Hinduism. No other person in all of our epics is supposed to have got the Atma Lingam of Lord Shiva through penance. The other side afraid of the power he was gaining and his skill tricked him into losing it before he took it to his mother. Again the king was just trying to follow all the rules good men had to follow at the time. Taking advantage of that they denied him his hard work that he had done so that he could take care of his mother. Yet our country hails Ravana as the villan who didn't care for anyone and was bent on destroying Dharma. In face this story tells us that Ravana was indeed an ideal son who cared for his mother and his family a lot.

What we need to teach the younger generation is that Good and bad is just a matter of perception based on the side you are on and that all evil is bad but not everything your side says is bad should necessarily be evil. There will be people opposed to me writing this and will ask me if i am an atheist or a mad man to praise Ravana. I would like to remind all such people that even Valmiki calls Ravana Ravana Brahma in respect of his great knowledge and even Rama does penance to get rid of the Brahma Hathya he was forced to commit because of killing Ravana. if you still have doubts then please do read the Ramayana. Do ccurse if you feel that I've made  mistake, after all that's a part of the learning curve. If you feel that we are evil for supporting Ravana then please by all means call us evil for that we would happily be. After all everyone cant be Rama in the world, we woud rather be ravana's and keep the world in balance so that we don't descend into chaos .